My sister is getting married. I'm so happy that after years of searching she's found someone who treats her right, loves her unconditionally and is her best friend. It's what everyone wants out of a life partner.
And I wish that is where the story ends.
But, it's not. This time in my sister's life has not just been filled with joy and love and support. There has also been anger and hurt and judgement.
And disapproval. Because...
Her soulmate happens to be a woman.
And according to some close to my sister, that makes their choice to get married--a legal activity in the state of Minnesota--wrong.
Marriage is between one man and one woman...according to these people. And what my sister and her fiancé are doing is not only wrong but completely against the beliefs of these people and what their definition of marriage is.
The definition of marriage. Something that has never changed and has only meant the union of one man and one woman. Right? Well, actually...
Regardless of all that, my sister and her fiancé are not trying to get married in "your" church. But "your" religion seems to keep attempting to trump their rights. They are asking for the same rights that all married couples have. That her own sister has. And why is that so bad?
The longer the stigma of gay and lesbian couples being less than heterosexual couples, then the longer discrimination and the unfair treatment of these individuals will continue. These things go hand in hand. If you say someone has all the same rights as other people EXCEPT for one (ie: marriage)--then you are discriminating and saying it's ok to treat some people differently based on one part of them (in this example: their sexual orientation). Just like it is wrong to discriminate based on the color of one's skin, it is wrong to discriminate based on who someone loves.
Since this is my blog, and I don't want to talk for my sister, I can only share my experience and feelings. I'm not gay. My wedding was a beautiful day that I was lucky enough to be surrounded by my family and friends that wanted to celebrate our love. And I remember thinking how lucky I was--how lucky we were. Everyone was there. Everyone supported us.
And, I might add, they supported us even though we did not get married in "their" church, either.
I want my sister to have that support and love. And she will, don't get me wrong. The people who will be there will surround them in love.
It's just that some people will be missing...and it makes me sad. I don't want to be angry anymore. I don't want to fight anymore.
I just want love to win. All love. The wise Lennon/McCartney songwriting duo said it best...
All you need is love.
